Over the years I have often shared in this column my desire for kindness, the motto ‘In a world where you can be anything be kind’ is attributed to Clare Pooley, author of the The Authenticity Project’ and is something that I like to use in my life on a daily basis.

The words became more poignant when linked with Caroline Flack who posted them on social media pre her untimely passing due to bullying. Having been bullied on many occasions I get why these words were so important to her.

I have over time come to understand that the bullying of others is often bought on by a feeling of inadequacies in one’s own life, by a fear that is deep rooted in them. It is often used as the person who uses the tactics struggles with their own identity or indeed the situation, they have found themselves in. In general, it is sad and I find myself now at the age I am feeling sorry for those who have the need in them to use bullying as a mean of unkindness towards others.

Using kindness in the form of defence often puts those who are unkind in a state of flux, not knowing what to do next, they struggle with the concept as it goes against what they believe would happen following their bad behaviour.

Kindness is the key to so much, if we all tap into it and use it everyday it will come back tenfold. Making it the norm, even in difficult times is sometimes hard when someone has upset you, but by stepping away taking a moment to reverse how you may be feeling back to kindness will deliver so much more than maybe its opposite counterpart ‘anger’

As a child I was taught by my parents ‘if you cannot say or do anything kind, say or do nothing at all’, it is something I always live by.

My family often laugh and ask the question if we are out an about ‘do you know that person?’ when they have seen me in conversation with someone, my answer often is ‘No, but a conversation unfolded anyway’. I love chatting to others who ever they may be, a young child, an elderly person who I may meet on a walk, the person next to me in the queue, showing them all kindness and a smile, it doesn’t hurt me but can change their day.

I believe that if in this often-traumatic world if everyone could just stop for a wee while to consider whether their actions are kind then maybe world peace could be achieved as for me it is heartbreaking to watch the news and see things unfold that are born of the understanding that anger is the key, not kindness. Now we may not change the world by all being kind in our area of this vast place called Earth however by using kindness to all you meet will indeed change the part of the world in which you reside.

So, lets all start by tapping into the ‘feel good feeling’ lets all take a moment to think about what we say and do next when reacting to a situation and let’s know that our words and actions can pierce the hearts of others as much as any physical weapon. #BeKind - and it will be returned.